“Is This A Good Time To Talk About What Happened?”

Do you remember flipping through Parade magazine on a lazy Sunday morning? I say ‘remember’ because they actually stopped publication a few years ago, back in November of 2022. But, if you were a local Sunday newspaper reader in America from anytime between the start of World War II and last fall, chances are you know exactly which magazine I’m talking about.

Often it was kind of fluffy. The content was heavy on soft news but could occasionally do something quite interesting, like their “What People Earn” annual report. I loved reading that every year.

Even though they have officially stopped publication, Parade lives on online. While I was researching articles for this week’s newsletter I ran across this article that I thought was spot-on for an EFT discussion.

In it, they describe 13 phrases to use to deescalate a fight with your significant other if you each have different attachment styles.

Two of my favorites: 1) “O.K., this sounds like…” as a way to validate what your partner is saying and demonstrate that you are listening. 2) “I would appreciate a chance to explain myself and hear what you have to say” as a way to acknowledge that communication is a two-way street.

Not everyone agrees about attachment styles. Some say there are 3 main attachment styles, others say there are 4. Still others say attachment styles are not fixed throughout life and relationships and that the whole concept needs to be reevaluated.

So, maybe you’re reading this and aren’t totally sold on attachment styles. Take at look at these Fair Fighting Rules and take ‘em out for a spin. We know couples are going to fight, and we may not be there to referee. Sharing some of these ideas might help. Let me know what you think.